Keeping a Bully Journal
A Record is a Practical Tool for Monitoring Bullying Situations
May 19, 2009
While the purpose of many other types of journals is to explore personal insights or maintain a sense of personal wellbeing, the purpose of a "Bully Journal" is more practical in nature. It is a place where parents or caregivers of children who are victims of bullying keep track of specific details regarding the bullying episodes as they occur.
Many students may experience a couple of isolated incidents of bullying in their junior high school years, but some children become the target of more widespread bully campaigns that can often reach well beyond the schoolyard. In these cases, it is crucial for parents to keep a record as accurately as possible of all bullying incidents that occur.
Entries Should be Factual and Detailed
An incident needs to be recorded as close to the time of occurrence as possible. Parents who believe they will be able to remember every single detail later simply by storing it in their mind can find themselves missing seemingly insignificant but very important details when the time arises to confront the issue.
Incidents do not need to be recorded in full sentences with the exception of quoting, as closely as possible, any verbal slanders or threats that may have been uttered by the bully or his companions. Points that should be noted when recording a bullying incident include the following:
- Who was present and what each persons role was – such as the bully, the bystanders and any other passersby or possible witnesses to the incident.
- When the incident took place, including the month, day, year and even time of day.
- Where the incident took place, including any landmarks or street addresses, as well as the positioning of the people involved.
- Exactly what was said, by whom and in what order. It is best to write this in dialog form if possible in case in extreme circumstances it becomes necessary to take legal action.
- Any other details that stood out to the child or to the writer as the child retells the event, whether the details seemed relevant at that time or not.
- Any relevant associations between the bully of the current incident and bullies of past incidents, if any exist.
- Medical treatment that was required as a result of the incident, including the name of the doctor who treated the child, the name of the hospital and the amount of time that lapsed between the incident and the seeking of medical treatment.
- If possible it can be a good idea to take pictures of the child's injuries if any physical assault took place.
The Importance of Record Keeping
It could turn out that the situations are resolved at the school level and the need for the recorded information becomes irrelevant. It is important to remember that even if the information is never needed again, it is better to have a journal full of unnecessary information than to not have the information at all should it become significant in the future.
In some cases it may turn out that the information is needed in order to deal with the issue at a higher level. If the bullying is occurring off school property, or if the bully does not attend the child's school, it could become necessary to involve alternate authorities such as the police or community elders. In these cases the onus may be upon the bullied child to prove what happened.
There also could be instances where the reviewing of the details with a professional could reveal underlying issues that could result in a life changing intervention for the bully. Such issues could include family violence in the home or the presence of an underlying medical condition that is affecting the bully's behaviour. In this case, not only might the information serve to reduce or stop the bullying, it could also help protect another child from harm.
Maintaining a detailed and factual record of all incidents of bullying against one's child is the best way for parents and caregivers to ensure that seemingly insignificant information is not forgotten. Details that may appear unrelated at first may turn out to play a significant role in reducing the frequency and severity of the incidents.
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